Guardian Angel

My world was turned upside down this week. I learned that I was moving shifts at work. I've been on Shift 1 since I've started. This is my family, my friends. It's a bitter sweet moment because this is such a great opportunity, but I'm going to miss everyone. So as I sit here during my last shift, I'm happy, sad, excited, nervous. I've cried for days, and I'm going to continue to cry. All of my guys are upset, and all I can keep thinking about is all of the memories I have with them, the good and the bad. So let's start this new chapter in my life, even if I'm not sure I'm ready. "

There are days that I just can't seem to win. Those days, my depression takes over my entire body. No smiles. No laughs. I feel this wave of fatigue take over me. Every one wants to know how they can help. They can't. It's just something I have to pray about and wait for the storm to pass. It's important to not take anything that I say or do to heart during times like this. My anger will be high. My patience will be thin. I will be annoyed easily. I can say hurtful things in the heat of the moment. Depression is something I battle with every single day. I can't remember for how long, but I know that it's getting easier and easier to manage. I take every day one step at a time, and I get by.

I went to my OBGYN on June 25th to talk to her about some issues I've been having. Well, they weighed me and my jaw hit the floor. Never have I ever been 160. From that day forward, I've stopped eating a lot of bread and potatoes and more fruits and vegetables. I have also been training to do a 5k with my mom. ON June 29th, I went to my PCP to do some blood work. I was down two pounds in just five days. I weighed myself yesterday, and I'm down another THREE pounds, for a total of 5 pounds! I'm no where near where I want to be, but I'm on the right track. Wish me luck!